We’ll Carry On

Meet Nazhifah Junia, a newly official bachelor of medicine. After months of conceiving The Undergraduate Thesis, I finally gave birth to it on October 15th, 2018. My “thesis pregnancy” journey, of course, wasn’t a common one, but then again so is everybody else’s. Each one of us has our own story of conceiving, nurturing and delivering our biggest academic writing yet.

Undergraduate thesis or what my faculty called Karya Tulis Ilmiah or scientific paper is a compulsory document needed if you want to graduate. It amounts to 3 credits (I know, only three, but that’s okay?) and has an expiration date of one year, but can still subject to renewal if you have already presented the first three chapters in proposal seminar, often called sempro.

I first registered my bachelor thesis title under the Department of Pediatrics in October 2016 but was canceled due to an unavailable slot (I did not know then, my ex-supervisor did not know then, it was a late information, really). I then registered a new title under the Department of Clinical Pathology, after helping my then future thesis supervisor and examiner’s research. The title, The Difference of Lipid Profile in Coronary Heart Disease Patients with Diabetes Mellitus and Without Diabetes Mellitus in Dr Soedirman Hospital Kebumen was registered on July 2017. I did my sempro in December 2017, I know, what a long gap, six months, really? I was just caught up in doing other things that were seen as very important then.

After my proposal seminar and its revisions, on February 2018 I submitted my proposal to the Ethics committee, I had to wait for my research’s ethical clearance which turned out took almost 4 months to be published. These four agonizing months of waiting were filled with academic exams, more academic exams, and more life exams, like tuning out my anxiety, coping with unmet needs and other things. In early June, finally, I could propose my research purpose to the hospital I wanted to perform the research about. This marked my first road trip to another city.

I was finally able to do sample-taking in July 2018. I learned to trust and to not trust some people. I also learned to befriended hard work and weariness. I spent the days in Kebumen in my best friend’s place, that being said I had to follow her routine (even though sometimes she left the house very early and I woke up an hour or two after). The realization of what would come after me in life became crystal clear: clinical clerkship is a collection of never-ending learning, consoling people and make peace with yourself. A real manifestation of what my life will be in the future as a medical doctor.

Mid-July 2018 was in itself a test for me. I fell sick and had to be hospitalized, which also meant a pause in my thesis making. A time away from my thesis pregnancy. In this time, the heartache, or should I say, the broken heart finally made its way to me. The somewhat world-shattering experience. I managed to get through, though, but like any other wounds, the healing needs time and some often ended up as scars. That’s unbelievably inconvenient, I have to admit, but that is a part of living.

August and early September went by so fast, my thesis was done but was once again faced with another challenge. I was torn in two: make an effort and waiting for a response. The long-awaited response finally came on a Friday. My parents’ prayers manifested. I was scheduled to have my bachelor thesis defense on Monday. It doesn’t stop there, of course. The real struggle came after.

I had to somehow manage to get done what to me seemed to be vague wishes and faced with uncertainties. Only my closest ones and the people who actually saw me in campus who know my real form during this time of life. I was messy. Hopeful but messy. Hopeful but afraid. During this time I also realized that there was nothing I could’ve done but pray. My prayers’, my parents’ prayers’, my best friends’ prayers, my family’s prayers’ all manifested, I was okay and will always be okay, InshaAllah.

Again, I must say, everybody else must’ve had problems too with their thesis pregnancy and I’m just so glad that my bachelor one’s now officially done. The whole experience has taught me a lot about life, people and myself. This is not the time to remember what has passed, it’s time to prepare myself for the future challenges life has prepared for me.

We’ll carry on. I’ll carry on. This is the start of beautiful new beginnings!

August 31st

Happy 22nd wedding anniversary to Papa and Mama, the only pair that cares more about my well-being than I often am.

I’m sorry I haven’t been home this year, I apologize for my selfish decision. Thank you for your understanding, though, and for come visiting me. This year must be tough for you guys too, yet you managed to, again and again, put me first.

It must be hard being the parents of a usually-unhappy person like myself, but you guys stayed, not because you have no other choice, but because you’re happy with my presence. You long for my chatty, long hours, crying my heart out on the phone. You enjoy my company. Thank you for staying because you love me. I cannot wait to make you happy now and later on when I’m successful both in this world and in the hereafter.

اَمِين يَا رَبَّ الْعَالَمِيْن

Friendship and Farewell

“The most beautiful discovery true friends make is that they can grow separately without growing apart.”

– Elizabeth Foley


Its the time in life again; separation. This time, my most beloved friends from medical school are moving to Madiun and Wonogiri. Mixed emotions. Joy and sadness. When will we meet again?

I think one way or another, the friends I made during my journey in medical school have passed Aristotle’s three kinds of friendships. Friendships of utility, friendships of pleasure, and friendships of the good. Most being friendships of utility (because apparently, you couldn’t survive medical school without being helpful to others and take the time to use a helping hand and some extra learning hours from your smarter and kinder friends) and friendships of the good. Minding you that all people featured in this post are all my friends of the good. We shared mostly similar values, goals, dreams, and admirations towards one another.

Friendships are unique, don’t you think? You meet someone, you spent some time getting to know them, you found similarities, you found un-similarities and then you found yourself already caught up in between having fun and sharing your deepest dark secrets and eating ice cream together. Some friendships were made without you knowingly making them, like passing each other in the campus’ corridors, saying hi! and then you found yourself often having lunch together and got this feeling in your guts that this is someone I can trust and rely on. Some friendships often start with hardships, you found yourself in the mud of sadness and anxiety, with assignments falling like raindrops from here and there, a swimming pool full of exams and theories to master; another, someone, was also in the same mud and showered with the same rain and a member of the same swimming pool club. A once upon stranger befriended each other and found themselves surviving the same storms; growing together, becoming the better them. Friendships, friends are unique. The uniqueness I love having and sharing.

Then come along new tests, are you really a worthy friend? are your survival skill can overcome the storms of being distanced and away? are you going to always be there when needed and when not?

 The separation. 

There are separations that you know deep down is temporary and the are separations that you know is full-time and not gaining it back. It; being coming back together. These friendships with these friends that I have is definitely the first one. This separation is temporary. Being the generation that we are, I’m grateful for the technologies that have advanced so greatly that you can sense people who are far away as if they are near. One call away people, I want to label them, are always ready to respond to my whatever messages and phone calls. The type that doesn’t make you wait in anxiety; people who understand. As a friend, I’m trying to play my part really well in responding to their emergencies and un-emergencies. We all know that not being responded is the root of all heartaches and trust-declines, so let’s not let these people with beautiful hearts down.

Kebumen, Wonogiri, and Madiun sure are far, our bodies sure are apart, but our prayers and moral supports will always accompany each other. That way I know, our friendships will surpass whatever hardships and storms coming our way. And no, this separation is not us saying goodbye, this is not a farewell! Have faith and study hard, doctors! I’ll see you soon and bring Jogja to you.

Too bad I don’t have all the photos of my special people with me but these ones alone. But then again, that’s the beauty of my friendships with people that I love and hold dear in medical school; we don’t need photographs to explain the bond we have to each other. I love you, good people!


The Hotline Bling

“Late night when you need my love
Call me on my cell phone”

– Drake


One had just finished his first clerkship rotation exam, one has just about to start her clerkship programme, one has just about to finish her undergraduate degree. The dynamics of our friendship does not end there, it has only just begun.

What constitutes a great friendship? Is it the frequency of meeting each other? For having a shared interest? Or having the same dark fears and struggles in life? It is trust and understanding.

These two future doctors are among the few beautiful human beings I have the luck to meet in Jogja. CU is currently doing his clerkship in Kebumen, Verlita will soon follow in Madiun and me, eventually, will follow later this year insyaAllah in Madiun as well. The three of us met in 2014, got sorted into the same discussion group in 2015 and clicked with each other right away. We went out almost every night to eat and just tell each other stories and listening to each other. Regardless of our personalities’ differences, they hear me, I hear them. They understand. With some people, you can talk and try sharing things that punch you in the heart but they don’t usually listen to you, let alone understand. They can pretend, of course, but deep down you know they don’t really care.

The Hotline Bling, we call ourselves, haven’t had a proper dinner since early this year; CU is in town so Verlita and he decided to come to pick me up and go out to eat. Today is actually the first day I went out since being discharged from the hospital. It was nice, we went to my favourite restaurant (CU decided to compromised his longing for Japanese foods and comply with my craving for western ones, Verlita was good with both options). I opted to dress in a long-sleeves black T-Shirt and topped it with a black midi short-sleeves dress with slit, grey trousers, houndstooth scarves and black wedges (forgot to take full body picture). Coincidentally, the two of them were also dressed in dark outfits, Verlita in her navy blouse and CU in his black polo shirt topped with a navy sweater (we forgot to take a proper picture, only selfies).


The 3-hour long dinner was filled with updates on each other lives, we were surprised with how things happened and how we faced it, how each of us overcame our problems. We discussed a lot of things, medicine and life-related. I like it with them that they do not push me or trying to correct me on doing things that I did, or how I responded to those things. They listened and nodded and I knew they understand. Isn’t it lovely, to have someone to truly listen to you? These two were brutally honest too, so I don’t see why not let the words flow and see how they react, so yes, we’re very honest. Boy, they let their words flow, too! If our dinner table was a bowl that could fill up with words, it would surely overflow.

The discussion led us to several conclusions, but the one I remember the most is: adapting and keeping yourself well-tempered regardless of what situation life puts you in is how you win. Since the number of stressors we face as medical students is already mountain-high, how we behave ourselves to our co-workers and people around us (family, friends, significant someone, the patients, people you meet at campus and hospital) have to always be good, even though it’s difficult sometimes to maintain such attitude. They also said that it does not matter how smart you are, if your attitude sucks, it will not take you anywhere, and that’s true. It is also a sign of maturity, being the bigger person. When you function only based on your good-moods, bad-moods, let’s just count on how many people you’re going to lose, even people who love you must be tired to watch such pattern of behaviour habitually and have to always put up with such grisly way of running a life. You lose people not because you don’t pay enough attention to them, you lose people because you only focus on what suits you best.


In the end, I thank you for sharing your thoughts, taking the time to listen carefully and not judging what each other said, to nurture each other, for having great taste in music and always in the mood for food! We’re going to be the best version of ourselves during our study and great doctors in the future insyaAllah. I’m happy and full and I left a chocolate bar in the car because I love you guys!

Slaves

In the 1800s in Rio de Janeiro, there was such a high demand from Muslim slaves in Brazil for Arabic Qurans that one bookseller imported over 100 Qurans per year to sell to the local slaves. The slaves would spend years doing extra work to pay for them.

Postingan ini sebenarnya dibuat setelah berdiskusi dengan Putri di Auditorium Kahar Mudzakir hari ini. Jadi, tadi kami bicara tentang our daily struggle to get out of the room and face the world; sesuatu yang mungkin bagi sebagian orang bukan sebuah masalah besar. Kalau anda mengikuti blog saya dulu, saya pernah menulis tentang my battle with GAD; bagaimana isi kepala saya kebanyakan waktu dan apa saja yang mungkin dapat memicu dan mengeksaserbasi kecemasan saya.

Putri dan saya akhirnya mengambil kesimpulan bahwa mungkin, inti dari keadaan kami yang selalu cemas adalah cara Allah untuk membuat kami rely on Him. Ada yang diuji Allah dengan cara mengambil fungsi anggota geraknya, ada yang diuji Allah dengan cara membuat dia kehilangan hartanya, ada yang diuji dengan kekayaannya, sedang kami, Putri dan saya; diuji dengan isi-isi kepala kami sendiri.

Mengerti tugas diciptakan menjadi manusia di muka bumi ini apa dan sadar bahwa saya, anda, kita semua adalah pelayan Allah. We’re all His servants. We’re all His slaves. And that is the most beneficial thing that could ever happen to any of us.

Dalam perjalanan menjadi pelayan ini memang rasanya banyak yang harus dikorbankan, makanya Qolbu ini perlu sering disiram dengan hal-hal yang baik dan orang-orang yang baik. Tulisan ini dibuka dengan ilustrasi zaman dahulu dimana para budak di Brazil rela bekerja lebih lama, lebih banyak hanya untuk membeli sebuah Al-Quran. Kalau mereka memiliki willpower yang begitu kuat untuk mengetahui, mempelajari, mencoba mengerti agama Islam, agama Allah; mengapa saya yang cobaan hidupnya masih sangat cetek ini masih malas untuk belajar? Mengapa masih sulit menjadi sabar?

Usia 20 Tahun Lebih Sedikit

Kalau berbicara tentang waktu, saya tidak begitu berani. Sampai saat ini masih tidak terlalu pintar fisika dan tidak terlalu filosofis. Mungkin mengerti sedikit perbedaan pendapat Aristoteles dan Galileo/Newton dan beberapa rumus yang dipelajari di bangku SMP dan SMA serta menyukai Einstein, jadi saya coba mengutip ini,

Dalam teori relativitas, tak ada waktu mutlak yang unik; tiap individu punya pengukuran waktu sendiri yang bergantung kepada tempat dan cara geraknya.

Usia saya mungkin hampir 21 tahun kalau diukur dengan waktu universal, yang berarti saya sudah hidup di dunia selama kira-kira 6,596e+8 seconds, tapi kalau menggunakan pengukuran saya pribadi, merasa hidup atau pengalaman saya hidup, mungkin bisa lebih atau kurang daripada itu.

Bayi

Manusia lahir ke bumi melalui perantara manusia lain, besih, tanpa noda, tanpa dosa. Pada masa awal kehidupan, sekitar 2-3 minggu awal implantasi blastokista; bakal manusia, fetus, berukuran hampir mikroskopik. Bakal manusia itu kemudian tumbuh, tumbuh hingga mencapai panjang sekitar 53cm pada minggu ke 40.

Hal pertama yang dilakukan manusia-manusia kecil yang dijuluki bayi itu adalah bernafas. Bayi perlu bernafas karena kelahiran berarti terputusnya hubungan plasenta dengan ibu. Ibu; perantara hidup bayi selama kurang lebih 9 bulan itu kini tidak lagi bisa menyokong metabolismenya.  Bayi mulai bernafas ketika terpapar dunia luar, perbedaan suhu mengakibatkan pendinginan kulit kemudian menimbulkan impuls sensorik, biasanya terjadi 1 menit setelah lahir. Ada pula bayi-bayi yang tidak langsung bernafas, tubuhnya progresif menjadi hipoksik, bayi terlihat membiru, dan gasping for air — akhirnya memberikan stimulus pada pusat pernafasan di otak dan biasanya menyebabkan bernafas beberapa menit pasca kelahiran.

Bayi itu kemudian tumbuh, diberi ASI ekslusif bagi yang beruntung dan susu formula bagi yang belum bisa merasakan kenikmatan tersebut. Selama 6 bulan, ayah dan ibu, atau ibu saja, menyusui bayi, memerah air susu untuk si bayi, menyimpan hasil perahan yang telah dilabeli di lemari pendingin, memastikan asupan gizi ibu cukup agar gizi bayi cukup. Pada tahap awal ini, ibu-ibu yang bekerja kemungkinan besar sedang mengambil cuti, lelah pasca persalinan perlahan menghilang tapi lelah-lelah lainnya mulai bermunculan. Ibu lelah tidak tidur cukup karena bayi menangis. Ayah lelah tidak tidur cukup karena ibu lelah bayi menangis. Ibu kelelahan memerah air susu, air susu lelah keluar. Bayi menangis. Tapi lelah ibu, lelah ayah, menghilang saat bayi tertawa. Saat bayi mulai berusaha untuk menyampaikan sesuatu, dengan mulutnya, dengan matanya, dengan anggota geraknya.

Sekarang bayi sudah bisa mendapatkan pendamping ASI. Ibu memilih untuk memasak sendiri. Menu pertama mungkin formula telur, dimasak dengan beras, bayam, minyak, garam dan air; yang setelah masak diblender halus atau disaring halus. Ibu melihat ekspresi bayi, kalau suka, ibu catat, minta ayah ingatkan. Kemudian ibu akan mengenalkan makanan-makanan lain untuk bayi. Ibu dan ayah berdoa agar bayi tidak alergi.

Ibu dan ayah membuat buku tumbuh kembang bayi. Ayah bertugas memotret dan merekam bayi ketika sedang lucu maupun ketika tidak. Ibu mengingatkan ayah besok bayi harus divaksinasi. Ayah mengemudikan mobil, ibu dan bayi duduk di kursi belakang; kata ayah, biar lebih aman. Bayi divaksinasi, ibu yang hampir menangis. Ayah melihat ibu, melihat bayi, menenangkan ibu, tersenyum pada dokter. Bayi sekarang sudah imunisasi lengkap; hepatitis, BCG, polio, DPT, HiB, PCV, rotavirus dan campak. Ibu dan ayah merasa aman. Bayi sehat.

Bayi sekarang berusia satu tahun. Ibu dan ayah senang, membagikan bingkisan dan makanan untuk tetangga, keluarga dan anak-anak di panti asuhan. Bayi masih belum mengerti banyak hal, tapi telah mengerti bahwa ibu adalah ibu dan ayah adalah ayah. Bayi memangil ibu, mamaah, memanggil ayah, dadaah. Ayah bilang, nanti kalau sudah lebih besar baru kita ajarkan untuk memanggil ibu dan ayah. Ayah bercanda, atau mau dipanggil ummi dan walid? Ibu tertawa, kata ibu, dipanggil ayah-ibu, papa-mama, ummi-walid tidak masalah, terserah bayi nanti, yang penting kita baik, bayi baik, bayi sayang.

Bayi, ayah dan ibu kemudian tumbuh bersama. Ayah mengajarkan bayi hal-hal. Ibu mengajarkan bayi hal-hal. Ayah dan ibu mengajarkan bayi kasih sayang. Mereka terus begitu hingga bayi tumbuh menjadi anak, anak tumbuh menjadi remaja, remaja menjadi dewasa. Dewasa kemudian menikahi manusia lain yang baik, menjadi ayah, menjadi ibu, memiliki bayi dan mengajarkan bayi hal-hal, mengajarkan bayi kasih sayang.


Postingan in sebenarnya saya buat karena saya sedang ingin sekali cepat menikah lalu punya anak. Ya, sangat pragmatis sebenarnya, dipikir punya anak gampang apa? Padahal calon suami juga belum punya yang pasti… tapi namanya juga keinginan, kadang suka datang dan menetap semaunya. Ngomong-ngomong soal anak, kalau diberi rezeki sama Allah, saya ingin punya 6 orang, nanti yang perempuan namanya harus dari 4 kata, dan yang laki-laki namanya terdiri dari 3 kata. Kenapa begitu? karena… ada deh, hehehe, rasanya lebih baik saya simpan dulu sampai muncul pembicaraan serius tentang anak dengan suami saya nanti.

Rencana berkeluarga sebenarnya sudah saya masukan di timeline hidup, perkiraan menikah kapan, perkiraan punya anak pertama tahun berapa, anak kedua mengikuti kapan, anak ketiga, anak keempat, anak kelima, anak keenam… Hal-hal lain juga sudah saya masukan di life-plan tersebut. Misalnya, harus menabung berapa banyak tiap bulan biar bisa bayar nikahan sendiri (walaupun in the end of the day, papa mama saya pasti akan kukuh untuk membiayai, atau mungkin keluarga calon suami saya, tapi saya rasa lebih aman untuk punya saving sendiri. Hitung-hitung untuk safety dan misal tidak digunakan bisa dipakai untuk lanjut sekolah atau bayar biaya anak sekolah, or even better, buat investasi lain lah ya, hehehe). Kemudian rencana melanjutkan sekolah, metode mendidik anak, baiknya anak dimasukan ke sekolah mana, saya mau jadi ibu seperti apa, sampai body wash yang akan saya gunakan untuk anak-anak saya dan printilan-printilan lain juga sudah terpikirkan. Yaa, saya memang anaknya suka terlalu dini memikirkan hal-hal menikah. Tapi tetap, bismillah, semoga rencana-rencana saya diridhoi Allah ya… Aaamiinn YRA.

Biasanya, kalau sedang curhat ke mama saya, beliau sering bilang, “sabar dan berdoa.” Jurus jitu sih, dua hal tersebut… Dari sekian banyak hal yang dapat dilakukan, dua langkah sederhana tapi besar ini adalah pantulan iman yang sebenarnya. Iya, sekarang saya hanya bisa sabar dan berdoa… serta menikmati dan mensyukuri hidup! Pekerjaan menunggu akan terasa biasa saja atau bahkan menyenangkan kalau kamu menikmatinya!

*postingan ini diperbarui tanggal 30/08/2018

Melihat Malam Bulan Juni

Bulu matamu, padang ilalang

Teringat masa kecil saat bermain bola di bawah purnama

Di jalan menuju rumah

Bahasa baru

Seribu kunang-kunang di Jakarta

Belajar berenang

Mengurus surat keterangan hilang

Pulang ke dapur Ibu

Hujan turun sepanjang jalan

Ketika jari-jari bunga terbuka

Sepasang sepatu tua

Di beranda waktu hujan

Kupandang kelam yang merapat ke sisi kita

Di restoran

Aku tidak pernah betul-betul pulang

Sepasang matamu

Dalam doaku

Bunga-bunga di halaman

Cahaya bertebaran

Yang fana adalah waktu


Diatas adalah daftar puisi favorit saya dari 3 pujangga kenamaan Indonesia; Sapardi Djoko Damono, Aan Mansyur dan Joko Pinurbo. Kumpulan puisi dari ketiga pujangga diatas yang ada di rak buku saya meliputi; Hujan Bulan Juni, Malam Ini Aku Akan Tidur di Matamu, Tidak Ada New York Hari Ini dan Melihat Api Bekerja.

Saya suka bagaimana sastra bekerja. Bagaimana seseorang bisa menciptakan cerita miliknya sendiri dari sisa-sisa kata orang lain. Dalam hal ini, puisi milik saya diatas, dari judul-judul puisi milik orang lain, saya merangkai cerita saya sendiri.

A Book A Day

I was just scrolling through instagram posts when I decided to click on the stories of people I follow. One story from a fellow debate club member bothered me. He was posting a chapter of a book. The next day, just like what I usually did, I clicked on people’s stories as I sat comfortably in my room after coming back from campus. The same person, this time, updated a different part of (maybe) another book.

I started to get very curious and opted to pay an extra attention on this person’s instagram stories. The day after that, he was posting another chapter of, as I guessed, a different book. I was wow-ed. I then decided to send him a direct message to ask him about his stories. I received a reply.

The Conversation,

The name is Sabiq Muhammad, a second year law student in Universitas Islam Indonesia. I asked Sabiq on Instagram, how many books he finished in a week? (while guessing that maybe he finished around two or three books) his answer, however, was not what I expected. Sabiq admitted he finished a book a day, every week. He called it; a hobby.

“I read a book, a day. It just happens to be my hobby,” I then asked him has the hobby brought some improvements in his everyday life since his hobby happens to be reading — cultivating new pieces of information and interesting facts about things in this expanding universe. His answer was very honest, he first answered the question with the type of books he likes to read. His preferences are philosophy and novels. “I like to read books, I prefer to read books than to do other activities. Well it does make me tend to be antisocial, since I’m too busy enjoying myself, reading,” Sabiq then continued on explaining the impacts of his hobby that he started to develop during his second semester in the uni, he told me that he usually save some money to buy books, minimally he bought 4 books every week,

“from the philosophy books that I read, I have grown into a person who enjoys my every day life, because it affects my way of thinking and how I feel about myself. I think its safe to say that I feel more independent, due to the influence of the psychoanalysts as well.”

“my activities are only few; sleep, wake up, read books. I think that my hobby is not useful for other people,” he ended that one with a laugh I think since the whole conversation took place on instagram direct. “people can say that I’m actually an unproductive person, well maybe the right term is… less productive. Besides from reading books, my other hobby happens to skip classes because of oversleeping.” I laugh on that one, its nice that Sabiq admitted this flaw regardless of the fact that he agreed to have our conversation posted on my blog.

I then asked him, “what are the title of your favourite books? oh also, the title of the last book you read?”

“I like Pram Tetralogi Pulau Buru (Bumi Manusia, Anak Semua Bangsa, Jejak Langkah, Rumah Kaca), I also like Marx’s Concept of Man by Erich Fromm,” I did not recognise the titles and felt like I have a lot to learn from Sabiq (and the books he read). “As of the book I’m reading now is written by M. Zaenal Arifin, titled Metateori Redefinisi Subjek Slavoj Žižek.” The title of the book Sabiq mentioned was also alien to me, I did not proceed to ask more about the book, decided that I have to do some learning on my own first then perhaps, consider asking.

The lesson learned,

I want to start this discussion by saying, reading is important, but I know for sure that everybody knows that. Instead, I want to say, developing good hobbies is vital and healthy. In Sabiq’s case, he decided reading would do it. For some other people, it might be reciting the Quran every day, or going to the gym, or writing a blog post, or going for a swim every Wednesday afternoon.

I have come across the idea that even though Sabiq and I share the same interest (toward reading, that is), I did not set a target upon it, unlike Sabiq who targeted to finish one book in one day and to do it on daily basis. Setting the target makes it easier for people to shift their interest/hobby into a habit. The difference of hobby and habit is that; a hobby is an activity one’s like doing in one’s spare time — it requires effort. Habit, on the other hand, is a set of behavior/actions done on a regular basis.

Sabiq’s status quo is that he already managed to make his hobby, reading, a habit. He finds it no problem to finished a book in a day because he has accustomed his brain to this repeated activity. Even though the activity may now become effortlessly done, Sabiq’s can still get new insights and information from his habit. He, too, now can develop new hobbies and still be making efforts to do things that interest him.

In my case, finishing a book in a targeted time of time is a non-existing activity (unless its related to my study and is required by my faculty, then I’m on board, making efforts). I read ONLY when I want to and finished the book ONLY when I feel like doing it. No target sets. Excuses are here and there. For example, I have been postponing on finishing Aan Mansyur’s Melihat Api Bekerja, simply because I only read it when I feel like I’m in a movie, when I go on road trips or after I took a ride to Mount Merapi. Oh and I have the book since 2016. Different scenario applied to Gita Savitri’s Rentang Kisah, since I was curious about the book and wanted to prove that its overrated, I finished the book in one sitting, less than 2 hours reading.

The inconsequence of doing what interests me is the root cause of why as per today I’m still unable to shift my interest to a hobby, then to a habit. I think some people have the same problem as me, thus, I believe its important to do what interests you by setting a target and to at least do it weekly, then biweekly, then maybe, every day. Also, keep in mind, the only way to do a great work is to love what you do! (Steve Jobs)

Well, we have reached the end of this post. I know that the post is lacking here and there, but I hope you and the people reading this have come to the realisation that having a good habit is good. Also, I hope you went to the gym today, plan to work out tomorrow, read a book, read the Quran and always healthy!